Thursday, September 22, 2011

el tubo

So, today, i was being lazy. shocking, really... BUT, I really wanted to share our tube experiences with everyone. Thankfully I have Corinne who already wrote all of them on the family blog. So I just did a little copying and pasting and BAM. done. so the following is not mine. Even the title is Corinne's. please enjoy.

This post is dedicated to experiences on the tube. (A.K.A. subway, underground, etc.) Just in case you have a very limited knowledge of the spanish language, el tubo is not the proper word for tube. Or maybe it is. I'm not quite sure.

1) Two days ago, we rode the tube home from Covent Garden. Actually, we do this every day for dance but two days ago, we rode the tube home from Covent Garden with Dad. First of all, this resulted in a lot of "ARE YOU SURE, HONEY??"s and "YOU'RE TOO NICE MARCEE, YOU JUST GOTTA PUSH YOUR WAY THROUGH PEOPLE!"

Second, when we got on the district line (the one we take to go directly home), no one was talking. No one was even muttering (except Chandler, mom, and I). Before I continue, you have to understand that on the tube, you don't talk to people. You don't smile at people. You don't even look at people! But lo and behold, Dad shouts, "HONEY, WHAT'S THE DISTRICT LINE? I MEAN, WHY IS IT CALLED THAT?" Mom and I made some weak guesses but mostly ignored his unnecessary shouting. But he wasn't about to let it drop. "REALLY, SOMEONE'S GOT TO EXPLAIN TO ME WHY IT'S CALLED THE DISTRICT LINE!"

By now, we're feeling a tad embarrassed (or more). We're surrounded by smart, able, British businessmen and Dad is acting exactly as a typical American would. Finally, a nice man sitting beside me, took pity on our family and explained what the district line was and why it was called so. He did this so fully and so smart-sounding-ly that I decided that he was a nerd. This was proven true by the book in his hand. The title read, "Scientists of the DiscoWorld".

But oh, my friends. The story is not yet over. He proceeded to berate one of the gentlemen across from us for not telling him and laughing his super loud laugh. I think we entertained everyone on the train that night....

2) We're were on our way home from Covent Garden one day and for some reason, it was packed. In case your wondering, in London, people would rather stand absurdly close to you than wait for the next train. Mom was staring nose to nose with some random guy, Chandler was compressed between two men, and I had some super tall guy's knees stabbing me in the legs. NOT FUN. And also, it smelled of that BO aroma we talked about. (We think there was a soccer game...)

FIIINAAALLLLYYY, we got to our stop and we pushed our way out as fast as we possible could. We did a little dance of happiness because we had escaped. We were wrong. EVERYSINGLEPERSONONTHATTRAINFOLLOWEDUSOFF. And then started chanting. I lost my patience. hahaha.

3)Not too long ago, we were on a fairly empty tube. There were scattered empty seats and plenty of space to stand and the whole middle bar wasn't being touched. At one spot, a slightly plump, old man came in. He looked around, took in all the empty seats and space, and stood RIGHT NEXT to mom. I laughed. Then, he lifted his arm up to hold onto the overhead bar. This resulted in an chubby, aged man's armpit in mom's face. I laughed harder. For the remainder of our journey, Mom coughed, covered her nose, and tried to stop her eyes from watering. I laughed even harder.

4)Some people take animals on the tube. And when they're puke-colored cats with orange eyes who look just like they're owners, I feel like kicking them.

Maybe you all have a little better sense of what the tube is like now.

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